I bet if you look back on your life, you can recall 5 major events that changed your life in a catastrophic way. It may look like success, it may look like failure, but it can typically be those 5 events that can begin to shape the way you see the rest of the world. For me, unfortunately, I had to go through the painful process of what the 5 major events were that impacted my life. Now while I could have chose millions of amazing childhood and past memories, the five things I wrote on my paper were not good. So for me to see the good things out of life, I had to force myself to see past the hurt and find the nugget. It is a constant effort for me every day. If I don't, new situations get added to my list of defining moments for me, and it seems it starts to unravel again.
Anyway, I was employed one time at what I would call a "dream job". I absolutely loved what I did. I felt like God had answered prayers, I felt like everything I ever prayed for, finances, a position I could be confident in and love, amazing people to work with and for, and the ability to be more than I was before. "God let me be somebody", was finally answered! But as there always is, there was conflict. Conflict that I didn't cause, but because of my position, I was put right in the middle of. For someone that had confidence in their abilities and themselves without years of "you're not good enough" thoughts, it probably would have ended different. But one statement changed my entire direction. "You're nothing but a coffee cup counselor".
I was called to a meeting at work one day. It was a "surprise" meeting for me. There was going to be 3 key leaders attending this meeting. Big leaders, that absolute top of the leader chain, and if you read my blogs, you know that this scares me immensely. One leader had become very bitter towards me, one leader absolutely adored me, and one leader appeared to be neutral, but for some reason, I highly respected this one more than anyone else. I knew something was wrong to have this "surprise meeting called", and in the state I live, you can record any conversation you are apart of... so I clicked "record" on my phone and I walked in.
It wasn't a good meeting. One leader telling me I was terrible and put me on a probationary period. One leader telling me I was amazing and that I had given 300%. It was massive back and forth confusion for me. As they instructed me as to how I should preform from this day out, the neutral leader I most respected said, "If you don't inform these people as to what your role is, they are going to be confused, you need to educate them on your role. You are simply a coffee cup counselor". If I was confused before...I wasn't anymore.
He might have just stabbed me in the heart. It would have hurt less.
I ended up leaving that dream job...based on many things, but this was the defining moment that sealed the deal. Why? Because of course, it coincided with all the other 5 defining moments in my life, and those that had been newly added from other hurts and solidified the truth of that statement. I loved the job, I was very capable of doing the work...but I was nothing but a coffee cup counselor.
Until, I believe otherwise, I am stuck and will always be a coffee cup counselor. Or, unless I see it differently...
As a hurtful stab, A friend at work purchased me a book called "Coffee Cup Counseling" by Harold Salsa. No idea what it was about. I left it sitting on my desk for my respected leader to see. After I quit my dream career, I read it. It said... most people don't run off and pay for psychologists every time they have a problem. They go to friends who will listen and perhaps will speak truth into their lives. Because of that, many times, a friend can have more impact. Maybe this respected leader was right...maybe I like to be a coffee cup counselor. Perhaps that is what he meant all along...
So next time you speak, remember that in your words you have the ability to speak life, or speak death. You have the power to lift up and tear down. You have the power to set heaven's ways in motion, or hell's. Yes,... YOU...and you get to choose what power you are releasing. Will there be people that choose to release hell...yes. Why doesn't God stop that you ask? He will, but until now, he has given us the power of choice. So choose.